JB

[ 2017年撮影 ]


Let me tell you our brief love story..12 years and 5 months ago, I met this amazing girl, she was a little bit aloof at first. Thank God for the foot spa, we had a conversation starter. We became closer until we developed feelings for each other. We had this once heart to heart talk until dawn of 22nd, and from then on, we were connected to each other like nobody else we had before. There was this undeniable deep chemistry, love and connection between us. But time was so cruel, just after a few days of being together, we were suddenly got separated. LDR was harder before unlike the technology that we have today. We wrote pages of letters just to express our feelings and longingness for each other. We send pictures and gifts through snail mails. We even had our own divine place of each others pictures surrounding our beds to at least cover up and ease the distance that we have that time. Until one day, we totally lost our communication. Last time I heard about her was that she got married. I was so furious but had nothing to do with it that time. I tried to forget her and move on with my life. After 2 years, we saw each other again. We were both shocked to see each other again. The mixed feelings of hatred and love were clouding my mind. We talked, but then again got separated because time didn't permit both of us to get back together yet. She told me that we still can't be together, neither do I because I have my lived in partner that time. But my mistake was, I didn't listen nor asked for the reason behind of what she said. We again lost our communication. Another 5 years had passed, and we saw each other again. That time I got the wrong assumption. I thought she were happily married and having a family that she wanted in her life, and from that day, I didn't contacted her again because I don't wanna ruin her married life. That's how much I love her, even if it breaks my heart into pieces. Another 5 years had passed, and just last October 2016, I don't know what had gotten into me. I don't know if I was just hallucinating, but there was this tiny voice behind my head, telling me to message her. The only strange thing was when I saw her again, in just a glimpse of her face, the beat of my heart got faster. I can't explain but all the feelings and longingness to touch her suddenly came rushing back to me like a flood. But of course, I had to suppress my feelings that time. We had the chance to see each other again. Slowly, we talked and clear things on what happened between us. And then I heard all of her sacrifices, all of her heartaches and tears because she had no choice when she got married that time. We both tried to forget each other, but heart really can't lie who it really wanted and longed to be with. She patiently waited, and even stalked me just not to cut her connection with me even though how it really hurts for her to see me with every other girls. Knowing the feeling of unconsciously stabbing her heart repeatedly broke my heart. But that was before, and I'm so glad that we have this chance again in our life. And this time, we won't let it slip away again. No more impulsive decisions, miscommunication and wrong assumptions. I wanna make it up with her, in everything. And I know to myself that she is the only person that I will love this way.. I will love her endlessly, more than any word could ever describe.

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